Turn down heat

(Devon Nitz | The Oswegonian)
(Devon Nitz | The Oswegonian)

It’s that time of year. The leaves are changing, snow is coming soon and nobody knows how to work a damn thermostat. For some reason, everyone decides that it is appropriate to turn up the heat as high as possible to counteract the chilly weather outside.

This is not only an incorrect move, but a dumb one. But fear not, as I am here to help those in need. Not only do I have a guideline as to how to properly heat your living quarters, but I also know why you feel the need to turn up your thermostat to the point where even Satan asks you to crack a window.

But let’s start with why people decide to crank up the heat to unnecessary levels. That can be explained in one word: summer. In the summer, the oppressive heat causes everyone to blast their air conditioning on full power. That is the correct protocol. But for some reason, that mindset has transferred over into the fall and winter months. That is incorrect. The difference is that heat needs to be defeated. Heat needs to be pummeled into the ground until you are practically living inside an igloo. Summer is war.

Winter, however, is the opposite. Winter is peacetime, when we all should embrace the cold and use it as an excuse to spend a Sunday inside watching movies and drinking hot chocolate. Winter is when we all break out our comfy clothes and take it easy. The problem is, if everyone is wearing thermals and jeans, the temperature inside should adhere to that, and more often than not, it does not.

How many times have you walked from your dorm to class in the cold and immediately after you sit down, you start shedding as many layers as possible because it is too hot? If you’re not saying “every day,” you’re a damn liar. I don’t have the statistics to prove it, but I’d guess that most buildings on campus have the heat set to at least 75 degrees. Unacceptable. I’m not wearing my hoodie as a sweat sponge. I’m wearing it for comfort.

No thermostat should be set over 70 degrees from mid-October through at the very least the end of February, but go ahead and push that into March for safety’s sake. But even 70 could be pushing it. Sixty-eight degrees is perfectly acceptable. It’s warm enough to keep you from shivering, but cool enough to make you comfortable in your winter gear.

And sure, there are extenuating circumstances in which that might have to change, but that is your base-level guideline. If you feel too cold, feel free to turn it up a few degrees, and vice versa. I probably won’t be where you are, so I won’t complain.

But please, for the sake of all of us, don’t get out of control. I understand you spent 15 minutes outside brushing snow off your car, but cranking the heat up solves nothing. You’ll be cold for 10 seconds less than you were going to be, then you’ll get too hot, and now look what you’ve done.

These rules are here for everyone’s comfort, which is something I am a big proponent of.

And on a personal note, if someone who handles the Campus Center’s thermostat is reading this, please turn down the heat. This newspaper’s office is always insufferably hot and I can’t take it anymore.

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