‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ fails to leave viewers scintillated

Jamie Dornan and co-star Dakota Johnson’s on-screen chemistry, or lack thereof, leaves a lot to be desired from audiences. (Photo provided by fiftyshadesmovie.com)
Jamie Dornan and co-star Dakota Johnson’s on-screen chemistry, or lack thereof, leaves a lot to be desired from audiences. (Photo provided by fiftyshadesmovie.com)

The highly anticipated movie of the year, “50 Shades of Grey,” brought in an impressive $94.4 million over the Valentine’s Day weekend.

The movie’s debut also stole the title of fourth-biggest-R-rated opening in history. But did the film really live up to the hype?

Dakota Johnson’s (“Need for Speed”) look precisely fit the role of Anastasia. Her disheveled bangs and disproportional haircut scream “I’m an English Lit major” as her big bright eyes attest to her innocence.

However, actor Jamie Dornan (“Once Upon a Time”) was not the Christian Grey one envisions when reading the novel. He has a Russell Brand ugly-but-cute exterior. The sort of face that may attract from the start but its appeal diminishes the longer one stares at it. Fortunately, his six-pack diverts audience’s attention away from his appearance.

The entire movie felt like it was rapidly fast-forwarding through time. The scenes were sporadic while the camera angles were chaotic. Relevant scenes from the book did not make the onscreen adaptation.

In the movie, while visiting Christian’s family home, the couple argues because Ana disregards an important rule in the contract which states that Mr. Grey shall never be denied sex. In the book, the dispute ends in steamy boathouse sex.

One of the book’s most notorious sexual encounters was also omitted. The nauseating sex scene, in which Christian Grey pulls out Anastasia’s tampon as a kinky gesture, did not make the cut. This was a respectable decision on the director’s part since no one would have been able to stomach the repulsive act on screen.

The acting was rotten. The actors did not have any chemistry between them and did not attempt to fake it for the motion picture. Their relationship feels awfully scripted. It is apparent the actors are not suited for their erotic roles.

Johnson’s soft breathy voice is exaggerated to sound innocent but eventually gets distractingly annoying. She is extremely awkward and goofy. It makes the entire movie hard to watch. The only time her acting is somewhat believable is when she drunkenly dials Christian from the bar.

Dornan does not embody the mystery that is Christian Grey. He makes Mr. Grey seem as dull as the color gray. His expressions are the same in every scene whether he is angry, happy or turned on. He is unrealistic, uninteresting and unsexy.

The movie focus should have been around producing the images of stimulating sex from the mind to the big screen. The sex scenes all together made up only 20 minutes of this 125-minute film. The sex was not sensual at all and felt more like a cheap porno. Instead of focusing on the sex itself, there was more of an emphasis on the ropes and Johnson’s breasts, which surprisingly had more camera time than Ana’s roommate, mother and                    coworkers put together.

The combination of bad acting and even worse directing make this movie the epitome of awkward. If you are looking for arousing sex-scenes you are better off watching “Fatal Attraction” or “Basic Instinct.”