For Republicans, screaming matches don’t equal debate

I don’t know what you did with your spring break, but I completely unplugged from American life and it was awesome. As I was faced with the reality of homework on Sunday, I was also slapped in the face with all the news I had been missing for the last week. Nothing says welcome back to America like the news that Rush Limbaugh now has a Twitter account.

I’m so over this whole new ‘let’s take all the rights away from women’ fad. Come on now conservatives, my little brother’s been pulling the “Wanna hear a joke? Women’s Rights!” gag for years and you’re jumping on this now? What’s next, are you going to start becoming conservative hipsters and say things like “I hated abortions before Obama tried to force Catholic hospitals to provide them.”

Okay, enough jokes, but seriously, what is the deal with all this stuff? We have Virginia passing bills requiring ultrasounds before providing abortions, Rush Limbaugh’s saying he thinks this college student is a slut and that if he’s going to pay for her birth control he wants to watch her have sex and then Rick Santorum says down with clinics that provide abortions.

I understand that Obama’s health care plan is pushing this issue to the forefront, but I thought these arguments were in the past. We’re a generation whose parents had birth control and now people are trying to tell us that we shouldn’t have it or that if we do we’re sluts. But wait, it’s only women who are sluts, not men. Go ahead guys, buy those condoms that’s fine you’re preventing STDs and pregnancy. We’ll just ignore the fact that birth control pills for women can help regulate menstrual cycles and treat ovarian cysts as well as prevent pregnancy.

Some are calling this a war on women. I don’t subscribe to that, but I see where they’re going with that logic. What we’re really witnessing is a battle of extremism and birth control has provided a fantastic whipping boy. With an important election coming up in November and what seems like a primary everyday, conservatives seem to be doing their best to out-extreme each other and they are really out doing themselves.

Beyond the whole birth control debate, we have Rick Santorum telling America he almost “threw up” when he read Kennedy’s speech about the separation of church and state, and Romney’s “not concerned about the very poor.” Being super conservative and vocal gets attention and that’s what these men want. It’s an easy formula to follow: say something out of touch with moderate America + 24 hour news network = your face getting plastered on CNN, FOX, MSNBC and all over the internet just in time for you to apologize for your remarks if they hurt someone’s feelings, while not actually apologizing.

While all this silliness has made for some fantastic Daily Show episodes of late, I wish it didn’t have to be this way. Yes, I’m that girl next to you at the gym snorting of laughter on the elliptical as I watch Jon Stewart’s opening monologue from the night before, but I think Jon Stewart is smart enough to make jokes about other things if need be.

We have a media and a nation obsessed with extreme ideals because they entertain us and give us something to talk about with our friends so we can seem hip and up to date on the latest political gossip. I like looking hip, but I’d like more well thought out, moderate opinions over an “oh yeah, well I’m more conservative than you are!” argument. Trust me conservatives, we moderate Americans can entertain ourselves without you guys trying to one up each other, after all “Community” is back on! I don’t care what other people say; extreme conservative values should not win you an election. Intelligence, sincerity and a willingness to work with other politicians should but what do I know, they probably think I’m just an elitist femi-nazi.