The Oswegonian

The Independent Student Newspaper of Oswego State

DATE

Apr. 19, 2024 

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Tips to secure new relationships

You’ve seen this person for awhile now, or you’ve just noticed them. Bottom line: You like them and you want to get to know them.But where should you start? Doing nothing is not the answer. If everyone could do nothing and get something then I wouldn’t be writing this. If you’re not sure how to approach someone you like, or just need help, here are some words of advice.

Be yourself.Don’t try to be something you’re not because eventually they’ll find out.Don’t try too hard to make the person like you.It could come off as being too strong or a suck-up.

Get their attention. Friend them on Facebook or network through friends.If you have a friend who knows them, this could be your golden chance to introduce yourself.If you don’t have such great connections, but you see them in class or at lunch, talk about what’s current—the class material, food or anything you think of at that moment.

Get to know them.See if you share any common interests with the person.Ask questions about classes, sports, clubs or hobbies.Use small talk.Just be casual and let the conversation flow.It’s good to have in-depth conversations, but beware of heavy topics like politics, religion or family problems, especially if the person doesn’t know you that well yet.It could either be a bummer or scare them off.

Location is important.It’s hard to get to know someone when you’re at a club or in the classroom versus sitting down with them to eat lunch.Location can help or hurt interaction, so be sure to talk to the person in a place that’s comfortable for the both of you.

Don’t rush.Be friends with the person and get to know them.If you’ve been friends with them for a while and want to take it to the next level, just be up-front and tell them.Just remember, everyone has their own pace, so don’t rush it.Both people should be comfortable when starting a relationship.

Here are some additional tips:Smiles are a sign of warmth, they help ease tension.Secondly, beware if the person has a girlfriend or boyfriend.If the person has not yet confirmed whether or not that’s going to change, think carefully about the situation before proceeding.And lastly, confidence is a key factor.Eye contact and posture is important, and tells other people about you.If you slouch or avoid eye contact, people know right away that you’re unsure of yourself.Only you are the authority on you, so stand up tall, make eye contact and be proud of yourself!